So, you’ve found yourself at a strip club. Maybe it’s your first time. Maybe it’s your fiftieth. Either way, there are unspoken rules — and breaking them can tranform you from “fun customer” to “walking cringe compilation” real fast.
Lucky for you, I’ve curated this essential etiquette list to help you vibe right, tip well, and leave the awkward at the door.
- Don’t Treat the Stage Like a Zoo Exhibit
What Weirdos Do: Stare blankly, arms crossed, as if waiting for a TED Talk.
Upgrade It: Engage your vibe! Clap, smile, tip, enjoy the artistry. It’s a show, not a tax audit. It’s not only OK to have fun—-it’s encouraged.
- No Pockets Full of Crumpled Singles
What Weirdos Do: Pull out wrinkled, sweaty bills like they’ve been hiding them from the IRS.
Upgrade It: Come prepared. Straight, crisp, bills, maybe a little discreet stack or a money gun if you’re feelin’ fancy. Respect the currency and the dancers.
- Don’t Give TED Talks Between Sets
What Weirdos Do: Trap dancers in conversations about crypto, your ex, or your screenplay.
Upgrade It: Light, respectful convo is fine — but keep it fun, flirty, and tip while you talk. She’s working, not on a coffee date.
- Don’t Freeze Like a Robot
What Weirdos Do: Get a dance and sit stiff as a board, unsure what to do with your hands.
Upgrade It: Relax. K hands where allowed, smile, enjoy the moment. You’re not being graded — just sit back and enjoy the show.
- Don’t Be the “I’m Too Cool” Guy
What Weirdos Do: Act like they’re above it all. “I don’t even like strip clubs. I’m just here for my boy’s birthday.”
Upgrade It: Nobody cares why you’re here. Join the party or quietly leave. Otherwise, you’re the dude nobody wants around.
- Don’t Police the Vibes
What Weirdos Do: Judge others for spending money, tipping big, or cheering loudly.
Upgrade It: Mind your own wallet. This is adult Fantasyland. Let people live. Jealousy is not a good look in low lighting. Good vibes ONLY!
- Don’t Get Sloppy Drunk
What Weirdos Do: Slur compliments, spill drinks, or fall asleep in the VIP.
Upgrade It: Sip, pace, and stay sharp. It’s hard to flirt when you’re nodding off at the bar.
- Don’t Assume Freebies or “Real” Dates
What Weirdos Do: Confuse politeness for romantic interest. Ask “what time you get off?” like it’s original. Newsflash—it’s not!
Upgrade It: Tip, appreciate, and leave it on the floor (literally and emotionally). Fantasy is part of the fun — but boundaries are real, so respect them.
BONUS ROUND: Pro Moves to Be the Favorite Table
- Always tip the DJ. He sets the whole mood.
- Compliment outfits and energy — not body parts. – Don’t be weird and gross.
- Say “thank you” when you’re done with a dance. It’s hot. Trust me.
- Tip your servers and bartenders too. Respect is the sexiest thing you can wear.
Final Thoughts:
Strip clubs are like nightclubs with better lighting, cooler people, and less small talk. If you can show up, show respect, and show love (in the form of crisp bills), you’ll not only avoid being that guy — you might even become a regular they look forward to seeing. The choice is yours.
Now go forth and be chill, generous, and slightly mysterious. That’s the winning combo.